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Back To School (Sequel to Undercover Cover-Up)
by: BuffyAngel68 (Send Feedback)
Series: - No Series - #3
Chapters: 010 Word Count: 21873
Warning(s): BDSM, Kink
Character(s): Jethro Gibbs, Tony DiNozzo, Other Male Character
Category(ies): Alternate Universe, Crossover, Established Relationship, Humor, Romance
Crossover Shows: JAG
Summary: It's been a few weeks and Tony is starting to relax and get complacent, thinking he's seen the last of the house. Big mistake...
Chapters: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10
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Back to School 3/?
"Now I can try and explain a little about what you're feeling. It's called subspace or head space. It's a mental and emotional state you slip into when you're in session or sometimes when we're playing. It's also called falling. Between one moment and the next, you let go of who and what you are in the everyday world, you ignore everything else and you listen and respond only to what a Dom is asking of you. As a general rule, I'm the only one with authority to take you there, but A.J. or Clay may ask for permission to take over at some point. You're to respect and trust them and allow yourself to fall just like you would with me."
"I understand, sir."
"If anyone outside our circle violates that, or even *tries* to, and I don't find out about it from you ASAP..."
"Damn right. You always need to protect yourself. Stupidly risking your safety, on or off the job, is number one on the list of reasons for correction."
"Is that rule two, sir?"
"No. Rule two is learn the list until you can recite any item from memory when I ask. Ready?"
"Two; lying, with advance knowledge that it *is* a lie. Three; breaking any prior agreement between the two of us. Four; any form of betrayal. That includes flirting, cheating, conspiracy to do either of those and not telling me when someone else approaches you with the intent to get you to flirt or cheat. Five; hiding or down-playing injuries and health issues."
"I know the last one will be hard on you, but it goes hand-in-hand with not being reckless."
"If you're right, and I'm not weak, it isn't... I don't think it's fair of you to ask me to act like I am. Sir."
"And telling Ducky or I when you're sick or hurt means you're weak?" Gibbs questioned.
"I... giving in to little things, using sickness as an excuse to wimp out when I'm really just tired... I can't let it happen. It'll become a habit and then my performance will fall off and next thing you know... I'm not your senior agent anymore. Once that's gone..."
Tony trailed off, his gaze dropping to the floor between his knees. Gibbs tipped his chin back up firmly.
"First, I have never once seen you wimp out. I don't think you're capable of it. And I know you try like hell to forget it ever happened, but not that long ago you *were* sick. According to your doctors, the results of those few hours could last a long time. In the meantime you'll get tired easier, you'll be wide open to any illness that crosses your path and you'll take longer to come back from injuries. I know how much it means to you to show the world you're strong and brave and ready for anything... but the Y-Pestis did a lot more than just knock you down for a while. It changed your life and you'll have to accept that."
"I don't know if I can..."
"I do. Second, the only thing that will ever change your status at work is you. You make the choices, Anthony, not me. If you ever feel like you can't do the job up to your own standards... then you come to me and we'll talk about it. The same if you feel like you're ready to step up and take on even more of a leadership role than you have now. The one thing you have to know is that I'd feel the same about you whether you're my senior agent or a dog walker. All that matters is that you're happy. If you do ever leave the job, I promise you it won't affect us privately. I will always love you, no matter what, and our relationship won't ever be affected. Understood?"
"Good. Let's keep going with the training." he replied, reaching out and lightly gripping Tony's bicep as he had in the office. "Remember how you felt this afternoon... and earlier tonight. Let go... let the rest of the world fall away... even as you're falling. I'm all you can hear right now, Anthony... I'm the only thing that exists for you. Don't fear it. Fall and trust me to be there... trust me to catch you. That's it... so good. Can you hear me, Anthony?"
"Yes... only you."
"For the moment. All this means is that I want your attention, but I expect that attention to be as complete and focused every time as it is right now. In the outside world, you'll listen to what I'm telling you then keep on with what you're doing when I let go. In the House, or in a play session, you listen and follow instructions. Clear?"
Gibbs now transferred his grip to Tony's wrist.
"This means we're going deeper. Deeper... all the way down, Anthony. Relaxed... calm... I'm right here. Go on and fall..."
"God... this is so strange... I'm not sure..."
"You're not giving up control, Anthony. The sub always has the control and the last word on what happens to him or her. You're safe with me and you always will be... but you have the right to stop this anytime."
"Say it and I bring you back up immediately."
"It... it's only for emergencies... and this isn't one. I'm just not... used to this."
"And you don't have to get there tonight. That's part of what a training session is for. You get to see what you can handle and decide whether to go past that threshold or not. The thing is, we're just beginning. Later, once I learn more about what your limits are, I'll probably push a little harder, but not tonight. Now tell me... are you ready to do this? Are you ready to completely submit?"
"I trust you... so yes, I'm ready."
"Alright. Remember how it felt falling from that airplane... but this time there's no fear, no worry. You're safe, Anthony... safer than you've ever been before. I'm here with you. Know that... believe it with everything you are."
"Yes..." Tony responded, his heart beating frantically as the woozy, drifting feeling built and built until he was no longer sure of the position of his body. All he knew, all he had to cling to, was Gibbs' voice and powerful presence. After a few more moments of struggle and fear, Tony's trust issues began to overcome him. Gibbs saw it and instantly aborted the attempt.
"It's alright, Anthony. You can't force this. Up... you're coming back up. Slowly, now. Take it slow. Good..."
Tears sliding down his face to drip onto the floor, Tony shook his head and berated himself. Jethro gathered the sobbing young man into his arms and rocked him back and forth.
"I tried... I swear I tried. I just can't go that far yet... I'm still so afraid I'll be hurt. I know you never would... logically I know it wasn't you... but I still feel it... like I'm there all over again..."
"I understand. It was just a trial run, don't worry about it, okay? Someday you'll be free of your past, Anthony. Together we'll find a way."
"I want that now! I want to be able to let go completely. I trust you with my life, my heart, my soul... why can't I just get over it and do what you ask me to?"
"It's not that easy and you know it."
Unwrapping himself from Tony and rising to his feet, Gibbs held out a hand. "C'mon... training's over for tonight. Time to relax and do something a lot more fun."
Tony stood as well, firmly grasping the offering. Jethro gazed at him solemnly and asked a question.
"Why were you allowed to stand just now?"
Tony hesitated, thinking swiftly, then smiled and responded.
"You gave me the signal when I arrived. I think... that lasts as long as I'm here, whether it's partial or full release. That way I can do what you ask without having to be released over and over. If you had to do that, the signal would lose its meaning."
Gibbs returned the grin and wiped the remnants of drying tears from Tony's cheeks.
"Good. Very, very good. Go on... hit the bedroom. I'll be there in a minute."
Tony swallowed hard, but did as Gibbs had commanded. Even after all the weeks since their last session at the house, and the leaps they'd taken physically that night, they had not yet fully become lovers. He realized that time was approaching and he wanted it badly, but unknowns made him jumpy.
Gibbs returned to find Tony sitting on the edge of the bed. "Relax, love. I'm not asking much for now. I just want to watch..."
"Me? You mean..."
"M-hmm. I want to see you touch yourself."
"But... can I ask..."
"Why? You can always ask why, Anthony. This isn't a master, slave relationship, where you can't ever question what I say."
"Okay... I'm asking."
"From our time at the house I know a little about what turns you on... what you like a lover to do. I'm dying to know more, though. The best way to find out is to let you show me."
"I've never... in front of anybody else."
"I'm not just anybody, Anthony. I care about you... I desire you."
"I know that... and I know I'm supposed to be getting past any shame or embarrassment when it comes to exposing my body for you. This is more than exposure, though..."
"It's vulnerability." Gibbs replied.
Tony looked at him sharply, wondering if Harm had revealed their conversation. Gradually, however, the young man relaxed enough to respond.
"That's it exactly."
Gibbs narrowed his gaze a bit and studied Tony intently.
"There's something you aren't saying."
"Kind of. I swear I'll explain. Just... later, okay?"
"Later." Gibbs agreed, nodding slightly. "You can do this, Anthony."
"I can try. I can't guarantee how I'll perform under scrutiny..."
"Personally, I discovered I do better. Knowing someone else is watching... it only adds to the intensity. Makes me wanna show 'em how good I am... how well I know my body."
"You sound like you've done this a lot."
"For Clay and A.J., yeah, I have. Only once on stage in front of strangers, though."
"I'll trade you that story for your revelation after we're done here. C'mon... lay back and show me how you pleasure yourself... show me your hot spots, how to get you hard and keep you that way until you're screaming and begging to come... show me, Anthony..."
Tony produced a laugh full of uncertainty and acceded to Gibbs' request. "That's it. Good... how do you start? Where do you go first?"
"My mind. Images get me going easier than words... so the fantasy always comes first."
"Uh-huh. What are you seeing?"
"Mmmm... one of my favorites... the past few weeks anyway. We're at the House that last time... except there's a bedroom suite in the far corner... so you stop just before I go over the edge... and you pick me up and carry me to the bed. You lay me down... and start kissing down my neck until you hit my chest. Somehow... you know my neck is sensitive, even though I didn't tell you..."
Tony stopped for a moment to wet the fingers of one hand in his mouth then began to circle one nipple slowly. Gibbs fought down the urge to interrupt the flow of Tony's narrative and settled for simply observing and listening. "When I start to whine, you understand that the stimulation's getting to be too much... and you move on. A minute later, you lick around the head of my cock... but at the same time you're squeezing at the base to help me stay in control. You know I want this to last..."
Here, Tony reached down with fresh saliva on his hand and began stroking himself very slowly. "Your touch feels so good... it's driving me crazy... but not as much as your voice."
"What am I saying?"
"Dirty things... all the moves you'll make on me... how you can't wait to make love to me... to push into me for the first time and watch my face as I feel it... and I want it too. I beg you, but you... you tell me I'm not ready yet... all you do is speed up your hand... and lean down to kiss me, hard... I... I come all over your hand... and you drink up my screams..."
Following his own scenario, Tony soon achieved his orgasm, though his vocalizations were moans and whimpers instead of screams. Gibbs let him recover in silence while he cleaned his young lover then climbed up beside Tony and lay down, gently pushing a hand through his hair and touching his face.
"That... was amazing. Quite an imagination you've got there..."
"For a long time, that's all I've had."
"No... thank God."
"So... you have something to tell me?"
"When you said that, about being vulnerable... I just wondered. When we were at the House, Harm said I needed to learn that being vulnerable is a good thing... that how much I let all of you in was a measure of the trust I was willing to put in you. You guys did help me stabilize and regain control that night... so I guess he was right."
"No 'I guess' about it."
"Right... if I can get to a place where I really understand that, maybe..."
Tony trailed off and turned onto his side, wrapping an arm around Gibbs and nuzzling into the other man's neck.
"I told you, you didn't fail tonight. You tried. That's what counts."
"Yeah... well, I choose to side with Yoda on that."
"How did I ever fall for a pop culture vacuum..." He grumped affectionately. "Star Wars, sir. Luke tells Yoda that he'll try to lift the space-ship out of the swamp. Yoda tells him that he'll either do it or he won't... that there is no try."
"There is in my world. That's the real world. Remember that?"
"Ha-ha. I told you my story..."
"I did promise, didn't I? Okay, so A.J. calls me up and tells me he's got an adventure planned and did I want to go along..."
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MTAC - NCIS Fic