Series: - No Series - #1
Chapters: 001 Word Count: 10422
Warning(s): Violence, Other (See Author's Note)
Character(s): Jethro Gibbs, Tony DiNozzo
Category(ies): Hurt/Comfort, First Time, Angst/Drama
Summary: Gibbs wasn't going to listen to him now. Gibbs was in full on protective mode. Nothing short of a nuclear missile set off in the back seat of this car could pry the man from Tony's side now. Okay, damage control. "I'm uh . . .maybe. . ." If he said it out loud he probably wouldn't have a job once the drugs finally did their damage. 'DAMN!!!' Instead of screaming he pounded his hand against the car door. "I'm maybe not as . . . straight . . . as I pretend to be."
Author Notes: Graphic m/m sex, drug use, violence. I should say that the sex might be construed as something less than completely consensual but, it's definitely not a rape. It is semi-violent though so proceed with caution
This is my first NCIS fic. I hope you like it.
Thanks to my beta Maryann. Awesome as always!!
The music thrummed in his head, more so than the rest of his body. Heíd been at this rave for eighteen hours and just wanted to get the bust over with and get home and get away from the vibrations jostling his body to the core.
Two weeks ago when the first dead Marine had shown up, they were able to chalk one up to drunken stupidity, shake their heads at the waste of it all and moved on. But when the next two showed up under similar circumstances, the NCIS team had to see the undercover op potential staring them in the face. Actually, slapping them in the face was more likely. Gibbs had been a bear after the first Marine was found but had been unbearable after the second. When they got the call on the third, Tony was already thinking up what he wanted his new fake ID name to be. They should have gone in earlier, say at least one body ago but, hindsight and all that.
Tony was in a back room. The music wasnít nearly as loud but the building shook nonetheless. Natasha ran a long, ruby-red fingernail along Tonyís cheek and pressed herself firmly against his body. He smiled in that reassuringly charming way he did and grabbed her around the waist. "So, we have a deal?"
"I must say that your offer could not have come at a more opportune time. Our previous ... arrangement was unexpectedly ... dissolved." She spoke gravelly with thick innuendos in her words and, most definitely in her actions. "We do indeed have a deal, my dear." She dragged her hand down Tonyís throat to rest on his chest letting a single finger dip inside to scrape across the hair. "The money is there." She nodded her head at the goon standing next to her and he opened the case heíd been holding to display the stacks of bills inside.
"It must be an early Christmas then." As soon as he said the word, his earpiece came to life. The sound of Gibbsí voice came in clearly just before he heard a commotion in the outer room. His first instinct was to reach for his gun, but they had taken it and searched him rather thoroughly before he had been allowed into this room. He quickly assessed the gorilla standing a couple feet away. He made no effort to come closer. Resolved that the only thing left to do was wait, Tony took in the stunned look on Natashaís face in satisfaction of a job well done. He wasnít expecting to be flung onto the couch backwards by her, but hey, if it made her feel better. He was a bit winded but recovered quickly and again, the human brick wall didnít move.
"Iím so disappointed." She ran that sickeningly sharp nail against his lip. "I had so many plans for us."
Before he could register it he felt his lip being pulled at teasingly. He pushed to get her off but tasted something bitter on his tongue. His first instinct was to spit it out but something plastic was being shoved in his mouth and filled the side of his cheek with the thick liquid. Now the brainless thug was moving. Between the two of them holding his mouth and nose closed heíd had to take a big swallow of whatever it was they forced down his throat before the cavalry showed up, Gibbs at the forefront easily taking down king kong with his usual jedi master skills and tossing Natasha like a sack of potatoes into the waiting FBI agent next to him.
Tony coughed and sputtered attempting to spit but nothing was coming up. Whatever it was, heíd swallowed it completely.
"Have a nice trip." Natashaís smug revenge evident in her tone.
"Get her the hell out of here!" Gibbs demanded as the FBI agent finished clicking the cuffs and dragged her away. He knelt down next to his senior field agent. "Hey, you okay?" His hand landed on Tonyís shoulder.
"Iím fine. I just... Iím fine." Tony didnít know what she had given him but, he was ashamed he had let it happen. He could have distanced himself from her as soon as heíd said the "go" word. He shook his head admonishing himself. Stupid mistake.
"Tony! Whatíd she give you?" Of course he knew, his tone demanded answers.
He looked around guiltily for wayward ears listening in. The FBI agents were not known for their compassion or understanding. If he had drugs in his system, theyíd immediately question Tonyís ability in the field and the sanctity of the mission. Tony spoke in hushed tones. "Iím not sure boss. Could be X. It was liquid though."
"Can you stand?"
Tony nodded his head and scrubbed a hand through his hair. He spotted a small, blue bottle on the floor and studied it a moment before picking it up. The lid came off easily revealing a dropper inside. Tony put the tip to his tongue and moved it away quickly. "This is it, boss."
Gibbs palmed the vial quickly and discretely placing it in his pocket. "Good work. Can you stand up DiNozzo?"
"Yea, boss. Iím fine."
"You wonít be for long. Letís get you out of here." Gibbs guided him out with a protective hand on Tonyís back. He stopped briefly to speak with Fornell while Tony reassured McGee and Ziva that he was alive and well. A few seconds later Gibbs returned to Tonyís side and spoke with Ziva, entering her personal space and speaking directly into her ear. Ziva nodded her understanding and tucked the small item easily into her pocket without suspicion. Tony winked at her and found himself being towed by the elbow to Gibbsí car and being placed inside. Gibbs had his cell phone up to his ear by the time he walked around the car and got in himself. "Ducky, I need you to meet me at my place ASAP. Tony may have ingested ... a poisonous substance." A brief pause before he got frustrated. "If I felt like I could take him to the hospital, Duck, donít ya think I would? Be at my place in 15 minutes." He slapped the phone closed and tore out of the lot in typical Gibbs fashion.
Five minutes into the otherwise silent ride, Tony looked to his left and took in the steely, concentrated profile of his boss. He leaned his head against the headrest of his seat taking in the familiar tingling in his body. It would happen sooner than he thought. How could he possibly get away from Gibbs now? He couldnít. Nothing he said would be excuse enough to let Tony go of his own accord. Not until whatever this was had run its course. The only thing he could do was a little damage control. "I did E once, boss."
Gibbs blinked and glanced quickly at the passenger side. "What?"
"In college. I did it once. Felt weird kinda like Iím feeling right now. Kinda too fast though."
"Yea? What are you feeliní DiNozzo? Tell me."
"Lightheaded, tingly. Mostly tingly."
"Youíre gonna be fine, DiNozzo."
"I know, boss. I just remember this and I donít ... itís not just me that has to get through this, boss."
"No, itís you, me and Ducky. Weíll be fine. You concentrate on you. Weíve had long nights before."
"Thatís not it ..." He looked away frustrated. How could he possibly get through this night without having his brain to keep his mouth, his actions in check? He turned back toward Gibbs hopeful he would not ask questions and just please do what he asked. "Can I do this with Ziva ... instead."
Instead of him was unspoken, but read in perfect clarity from Jethro. Hell no. He locked his gaze on Tonyís haunted eyes for a moment. There was something in them that spoke of some long-standing something that Tony had never shared with him before. Maybe with anyone. "Tell me, Tony. Whatever it is, Iím not goiní anywhere."
Tony closed his eyes, the tingling growing and he couldnít help but press the heel of his hand setting absent mindedly on his lap into his fast-growing cock. He hissed minutely and shook his head. Of course not. Gibbs wasnít going to listen to him now. Gibbs was in full on protective mode. Nothing short of a nuclear missile set off in the back seat of this car could pry the man from Tonyís side now. Okay, damage control. "Iím uh ...maybe..." If he said it out loud he probably wouldnít have a job once the drugs finally did their damage paving a life of regret and lonlieness for him. ĎDAMN!!!í Instead of screaming he pounded his hand against the door.
"Tony, trust me."
Gibbs waited patiently.
"Iím maybe not as ... straight ... as I pretend to be." There, heíd said it.
He didnít look disgusted. A little surprised maybe, but definitely not disgusted. Tony moved forward in his seat leaning back heavily trying to make himself smaller. "I, um. Iíve liked men ... a lot, and I know what this drug does. I donít think Iíll be able to keep myself in check."
"Iím not gonna hold it against you, DiNozzo. What happens at my place, stays there. Understood?"
"Got it, boss."
By the time they had reached Gibbsí house Tony was not himself. "Iím not feeling so hot, boss." He stared at his hands as though they werenít a part of his body. He tested out the use of each finger one at time as though he was shocked when each one worked in turn. He smiled reveling in the feel of the tendrils of happiness that moving each finger caused throughout his body. He felt the gust of air as the car door was opened and then hands on his body dragging him out of the car. "God, yes." He flung himself at his boss and planted his face into the crook of shoulder meeting neck and breathed deeply. He righted his stance and nipped at the neck before him. "Thank you for helping me, boss." He wanted to roam his hands over the body before him but something was stopping them from moving. Frustrated, he continued to nip and kiss the flesh at his disposal. "You always keep me safe."
The arrival of Duckyís Morgan brought Gibbs out of his stupor. "Duck! Help me get him inside."
The doctor grabbed his bag quickly from the seat next to him and rushed to his friendís side. "Oh my. It would seem our dear Anthony is a bit smitten with you, Jethro."
Gibbs glared at his long-time friend.
"Yes, well, be that as it may, I assume this poisonous ingestion you spoke of might involve a bit of XTC?" Ducky stated knowing the particulars of the cases leading up to this assignment.
Ducky assisted Jethro in prying Tony away and began their trek toward the house. "How long ago was the substance ingested?"
"Sixteen minutes ago."
"Oh dear." The look of astonishment got Gibbsí attention.
"What, Duck? Does that mean somethiní to you?"
"It is awfully quick. Did you, by any chance, get a sampling of the substance?"
"Abby should have it by now."
"Good, we should be able to get a better idea of what weíre dealing with then but her tests might prove too little too late, Iím afraid."
They plopped Tony onto the sofa finally and Gibbs glared at the doctor once more.
"You see, the common street drug of MDMA or X or E as it is commonly referred, has a peak at about 60 minutes to 6 hours and contains approx 80mg of the active ingredient causing feelings of safety, trust, self-acceptance, euphoria, heightened sensitivity to touch, and an increased sense of intimacy with others. Iím afraid that the common street variety of the drug is not what our boy ingested.†† When did he show symptoms?"
"Within ten minutes."
"Jethro, weíre dealing with a designer variation of the drug. Probably double the active ingredient if not simply a more potent form such as methylenedioxyamphetamine instead of methylenedioxymethamphetamine. Of course, it is likely mixed with something else as well which could be anything really."
"The point, Jethro, is that without knowing what the substance is exactly we have no way of knowing what weíre dealing with. There is no cure, either way. We have to simply wait it out, but knowing what it is will help in that we will know how long that wait might be."
Jethro looked down at his agent restlessly fidgeting on the couch reaching out to touch him seemingly happy for the moment he had caught his pound of flesh in the death grasp he had on Jethroís thigh. Gibbs sighed. "What kind of symptoms are we talkiní?"
"Well, on the low end we have a very uninhibited, euphoric, touchy, grabby Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo. In short, very horny. On the serious end, increased blood pressure, increased heart rate, increased body temperature, cardiac arrhythmias, electrolyte imbalance, urinary retention, kidney failure, increased physical activity. Jethro, are you sure you want this handled here? The best place for him is in the hospital."
"Duck, if you think there is no other way, then weíll do what we have to do to keep him safe. But, if there is any way we can keep this off the books and away from the FBI and the judgments that go along with it, than we owe that to Tony. Is there anything we can do to prevent these things from happening and keep him safe here?"
Ducky took in a long breath. "Iíll call Jimmy to bring me some supplies. But ..." The shorter man got into Gibbsí face unafraid of the consequences. "If Abby feels that the half life of this drug is longer than what I believe I can safely treat him here or if I say that it is time to go to the hospital, then to the hospital we will go without a single argument from you. Understood?"
"Yea, Duck. Understood." Gibbs tilted his head taking in the doctorís sincerity knowing the man was only looking out for the well being of his coworker, teammate, friend. He couldnít fault the man for that no matter the tone.
Dr. Mallard turned and made a call from his cell phone as Gibbs pried Tonyís hands from his thigh.
"Címon, DiNozzo, let go for a minute. Iím not goiní anywhere." He sat next to Tony immediately regretting it as the agent next to him snuggled up to his side without pause. Under any other circumstances, heíd feel elated but, as it was, he felt like he was taking advantage of the man. When Tonyís hand reached under his shirt to rub his chest hair, Gibbs jumped up off the sofa staring down at a very disappointed special agent. He looked up to find Ducky return to the room closing his cell phone.
"Jimmy is on the way with the supplies Iíll need. I do have some basics with me though. Weíll need to get him into the bedroom and get his shirt off. Itíll be easier access to his chest for frequent assessments and I need to start an IV and get some fluids pumped into him. It will, hopefully keep his kidneyís working, treat any pending electrolyte imbalance and keep him hydrated. Help me move him then."
"I got it, Duck." Jethro reached down and pulled DiNozzo up easily holding his waist against his body by the belt and keeping Tonyís arm anchored around Gibbs shoulder with his own hand. It didnít occupy the opposite arm but he could handle the one groping arm much more easily without its counterpart in the way. As one solid entity, they moved down the hall and into Gibbsí bedroom followed closely by the doctor. Gibbs chose the master bedroom versus the guest room because he thought having the attached bathroom would come in handy during the process.
Gibbs sat him down on the edge of the bed before kneeling in front of him and unbuttoning his shirt. His efforts were thwarted when his charge began returning the favor. Frustrated, Gibbs stood and Tony moaned with need at the loss. "Duck, Iíll hold his hands. You take off the shirt."
"Yes, yes. Excellent idea." Ducky moved in and began the task Gibbs had started.
Tony leaned in to the touch more frustrated when he found he could not participate. "Doc? Mmm... I love you." He pushed until his face was millimeters from Ducky and stopped to look into the doctorís eyes before planting a kiss to his forehead.
"I love you too dear Anthony." He placed the stethoscope in his ears now that the shirt was out of the way and encouraged his patient to be quiet with a finger held up to his own lips. He snickered in spite of himself as Tonyís manic response was to whisper Ďsshhhhí to himself.†† The humor was lost however when he heard the quickened beat of Tonyís heart working overtime. He listened to his lungs quickly not forgetting the abuse his lungs had already endured with his bout with YPestis last year. Hearing an undeniable hiss of pleasure from Tony everytime he placed the instrument on another part of the mansí body was expected but, nonetheless, disheartening and telling of a friend in no control of his own body. He sighed in grief knowing this was going to be one of the hardest things Anthony would have to go through despite being in danger of being shot, stabbed, blown up or beaten everyday of his life. It was one thing to be at the mercy of others, to count on fellow teammates to have your back. Hell, that was easy. It was a completely different issue to be at the mercy of your own behaviors and issues in embarrassingly full detail with your boss and coworker looking on in horror. He pulled out the blood pressure cuff taking quick measurements. Even if he could pull Tony through this, he doubted there wouldnít be lasting effects. He motioned for Gibbs to help him get Tony properly into the bed. "His blood pressure is high but, not dangerously so, his heart is way too fast. But," he sighed. "he is stable. I do suggest we keep the audience to a minimum. The less he has to explain to anyone else the better."
"Itís just you and me. Thatís it."
"Yes, I quite agree." He grabbed his phone as it was ringing the first time. "Yes." "Well done, Jimmy. Iíll meet you outside." He held up a finger and pointed to the doorway following his own lead as he left the room.
Ducky returned a few moments later to find Jethro being manhandled by Anthony. He took in Gibbsí debauched look with his hair mussed, his shirt pushed up to his armpits , the flush of his skin and his reddened, thoroughly kissed lips. If he had gotten close enough, he wasnít sure whoís pupils would be dilated more, Tonyís or Jethroís. "Would you like me to leave the two of you alone?" His tone was bordering suspicion and humor.
"Not funny Duck. Can you give him something?"
"Certainly not. Iíll keep his blood pressure and heart rate under control but I donít dare mix narcotics with the unknown cocktail he already has on board."
"So, weíre just gonna sit on his hands all night?"
"Iím afraid thatís your department Jethro. My work is already cut out for me keeping him stable through the night. How you keep him pacified is your business." Ducky sat on the bed reaching for Tonyís arm that was presently busy making Jethroís life miserable. "Lay him down. I need to start this IV."
"Sure Duck. No problem. Heís not a light weight ya know."
"Yes, I can see that." He began pulling at Tonyís arm. "Come over here, Anthony." Ducky was getting frustrated. "For heavenís sake. Jethro push him down and lay over top of him."
Jethro eyed the shorter man with a raise in his eyebrow. He shrugged. "This is not gonna be pretty, Doc."
"No, probably not but, Iím certain Iíve seen worse. On with it."
Gibbs pushed forward sending Tony back to lay flat on the bed. He hooked his feet around Tonyís ankles anchoring them to the bed. Laying fully across the manís body kept him pinned and he grabbed both of Tonyís hands keeping them entwined with his own. He felt Tonyís hardness poke into his own hip and stared down at the smiling man. He rolled his eyes. ĎGreat. That didnít help at all!í "Can you get to him?" His question directed toward the doctor even though he didnít look away from Tony.
"Can you hold his hand downward instead of over his head like that?"
"Sure, no problem, Duck." His tone sarcastic as he struggled to make the man beneath him more malleable. "Donít start the IV in his wrist. Iím gonna have to tie him down."
"No, donít tie me down, boss. ††Plleeeease."††
"DiNozzo! You in there? Can you understand me?"
"Listen to me. I need you to relax. Weíre taking care of you. I want you to rest, okay?"
"Mmmnn....canít. I feel like danciní. You wanna dance with me?" He jabbed his hips upward thrusting them into Gibbs.†† He felt a funny sensation in his arm. He attempted to jerk the arm away not sure if it was a good feeling or bad but, he wanted to explore it further. "What the ...?"
"Anthony, itís an IV. I need to give you fluids."
"Okay." He turned to look into Gibbsí face that was currently about two inches from his own. Noting the concern, Tony brought his head up and kissed his boss, square on the lips, right in front of the ME. He knew he should probably care about that but, he didnít. Instead he insistently deepened the kiss separating the unwilling lips with his own tongue. He had to have him. It was not a choice.
He heard words being spoken but the only thing on his mind was a very hot, very hard Jethro Gibbs melted against his own body. That fact spoke volumes to Tony as he thrust upwards, as he kissed him only to realize he needed more. So much more. He moved to unbutton his pants, maybe brush up against Gibbsí cock as well on his way down but, was met with resistance when he ordered his arm to respond. All too quickly the warmth was gone and he was left laying alone on a bed unable to move. This was not happening. NO. Come back! It was dark in the room now. His shackles nowhere near enough contact to help him. He glanced around the darkened room. He could faintly make out a shadow and knew it was Gibbs. "Please, help me."
"I am helping you Tony. Try to sleep."
Sleep? How in the world could he sleep? Was he joking? His world was too noisey, too loud, too much, not enough. He could hear the drip of the IV and felt every drop flow into his veins. He could hear his hair brush up against his pillow and each one was hard wired straight to his groin. He arched his back digging his butt into the mattress just to get some contact, some kind of friction. He needed . . . something. Anything! He had kissed his boss. Done much more than that. In the back of his brain that was probably not a good idea but, he could not figure out why. What did it matter afterall. Gibbs always had his six. Always kept him safe. Was always there for him when he needed something. He needed him now. He needed him so much. He silently begged as he thrashed about looking, searching for the contact he needed more than he needed to breathe.
Ducky came in once again for his hourly check listening to Tonyís lungs, heart, taking his blood pressure, taking his temperature. He sat with a heavy sigh and inserted a syringe full of medication into the port on Tonyís IV. The whimper coming from Tony could not be ignored.
Gibbs flinched at the noise once again emanating from Tony. "Whatíre you giving him now?"
"Itís a vasodilator. It will help with his blood pressure and hopefully keep his heart rate controlled."
"Duck, itís been hours."
"Yes, I know. Iím afraid Abby has gotten her results back. The standard 80mg MDMA dose in the street form of the drug was not used in this version at all. The MDMA dosage used was more akin to 200mg. Which means the half life of the drug is close to 16 hours, give or take an hour."
"That means weíre not even half way there yet and heís already exhausted." He scrubbed his hands through his hair.
"Jethro," He moved closer speaking softly to Gibbs. " I donít mean to sound crass but, have you thought of giving young Anthony some ... help."
"Whatíre you talkiní abou,t Duck? You said we were doing all we could do."
"I said I had done all I could do for him. You, on the other hand..."
Gibbs looked at him with a raised brow. "Duck... I-"
"Itís not taking advantage. Itís precipitating the inevitable."
Gibbs didnít have it in him to act shocked at Duckyís observation. He knew the man was right he just hadnít been aware he was projecting it so loudly. He admonished himself for being so careless.
"Imagine how he feels. Alone, dejected and the drugs coursing through his body making all his feelings of inadequacy first and foremost in his mind. You sitting over here with nothing but all the power and choosing to give him absolutely no solace. He will feel the effects of this drug long after it has peaked and finally left his system. It will leave the chemicals in his brain off kilter for days. In the long run what you need to accomplish here and now is a relationship base that he will not stagger away from but, will lean against."
"And you think my molesting his drugged body is going to give him that base?"
"I think giving your man something he needs in order to make his suffering less is something you should give him. Yes. If it were Ziva or Abby you wouldnít think about it twice."
He tilted his head thinking. The doctor was right, but his girls wouldnít give it a second thought. They would both chalk it up to consequences of the job and everything would be back to normal. Could he do that with Tony? Could Tony do that with him so casually? Gibbs had been dueling with his emotions regarding DiNozzo for so long, had made so many choices about him without Tonyís knowledge, made so many plans. When he was feeling punchy and tired of the reality that every move he made, every word spoken, every slap to the manís head could not otherwise be surmised as a preamble to Jethroís bed, he thought about Tony in his bedroom. Purely in some cosmic alternate universe where his fantasy could live, heíd thought about Anthony in his bed. A naked, willing participant in their lovemaking. He blinked and looked into the angry doctorís eyes not giving indication of where his thoughts had roamed.
"Well then go and get one of the girls for him and be done with it dammit. But do something for Christ sakes, the boy is suffering."
Gibbs winced. "Shut the door on your way out Duck. Iíll open it when you can come back in."
Ducky nodded and made his way to the door closing it tightly as he left. He shook his head. "About damn time."
Jethro stood at the foot of the bed watching Tony writhing, respirations deep, labored. He was obviously restless and uncomfortable. He untied first the left ankle restraint which was just a necktie from his own closet, and then the right. Tony hissed moving both legs upward and curled into a fetal position as best as he could with both hands cuffed in opposite corners of the bed. "Iím going to release your left hand Ton,y but not your right one, okay."
Tony nodded pulling his hand to his face the moment it was free. He rolled onto his right side shivering even though he knew he was hot with fever. "B...boss...I canít do this. I need something... you canít give me. I donít blame you ... but I need ... so bad." He felt the bed sink behind him and hands come around his waist. The sensation of someone breathing against his skin made him arch his back and gasp deeply the pure sensation sending an arch of pleasure straight to his cock. "Please."
"Iím just going to hold you, Tony. Weíll ride this out together."
"I canít, boss... I really canít. Need ... god, I need..."
"Take a deep breath. I got ya."
Tony rolled away sitting straight up on the edge of the bed. If he wasnít cuffed to it he wouldíve been gone. "Dammit, Gibbs! I canít breathe, I canít sleep, I canít rest. I need more and I need it from you. If you canít give me what I need, please go get Ziva, sheís done worse for less, Iím certain."
"Tony, you donít mean that ..."
Tony gave a defeated sigh and tried not to focus on the fact that his skin was crawling. "What time is it?"
Tony couldnít help the whimper that escaped his lips. Time was just not moving at all. He startled when he felt a hand push against his groin. He pushed into the touch and hissed. Soon the disembodied hand found his belt buckle undoing it quickly and efficiently. Tony squeezed his eyes shut. This wasnít right. God help him, he knew it wasnít right. He may as well have assaulted Gibbs given the choice he was giving him. He could no more stop Gibbsí touch than he could stop his heart from beating. This was going to happen. It couldnít not happen. He rolled over matching face to hands and apologized with the beseeching look rather than with words.
Gibbs acknowledged the pain and unzipped Tonyís pants and sat up to shimmy boxers and jeans down Tonyís hips to mid-thigh. "You okay?"
Tony nodded his head and closed his eyes hating himself for loving the feel and for needing the touch as much as he did.
Jethro straddled Tonyís thighs and began stroking the erect cock languidly, slowly, unhurriedly. He could feel Tonyís muscles were tightened beneath him. Every single one. He was stiff as a board. "Try to breathe, Tony."
Again, Tony nodded expelling a deep breath as instructed. He sucked in a deep breath when he felt a hand on his chest. He looked up to find his boss leaned far over him, one hand on his chest rubbing his thumb against his nipple and the other hard languorously stroking his cock. He was tired of hearing the whimpering need coming from his own lips, but he heard it again nonetheless.
"Are you okay, Tony?" He asked again. "I want to hear words this time, DiNozzo."
"Yes. Iím okay."
"Good man." Gibbs leaned in closer and kissed Tony on the mouth quickly. "Weíre not gonna do anything too strenuous. Duckyís been pumping you full of meds to keep you pressure and your heart rate controlled. Understand?"
He started to nod again but at the stern look heíd seen from his boss, thought better of it. "Yes."
"Words are good, DiNozzo."
"Well, maybe a bit more variety would be good too huh, DiNozzo?"
"Ye... okay." The smile heíd seen on Gibbsí face reached his eyes. He hadnít seen that smile directed at him in... well, ever. It felt good to see it.
"Youíll work on it."
Tony couldnít find any more words as the feeling growing in the pit of his belly made itself more prominently known. It grew exponentially. His cock grew harder in conjunction. The stroking went on and gloriously on. He was taken to the edge but, could not find his way to fall over.
"Not doiní it for ya, huh?"
"God, ... Iím there ... I just canít."
"Okay. Hold on." Without preamble Gibbs simply lowered himself down Tonyís body and took the cock into his mouth expertly taking it to the back of his throat and beyond. He sucked him in balls deep and pulled all the way back out. Slowly he sunk at first then quickened his pace.
Tony held Gibbsí head with his left hand. Not really pushing him onto his cock although he wanted to badly. He did thrust upwards at Gibbsí downward thrust and he thought he was going to choke the man to death, but Gibbs simply backed up, gave Tony a look and kept going holding Tonyís hips down against the bed. Soon the pace had quickened moreso and Gibbs was fucking Tonyís cock with his mouth. He added a pop at the end when he let it come out of his mouth. He teased the tip of Tonyís cock with his tongue and thrust back down upon it again.
Frustrated, Tony pushed at his pants, needing more.
Gibbs caught on and helped Tony pull off the jeans and boxers and tossed them aside. He spread Tonyís legs and dove back in taking hold of the manís balls and taking them into his mouth one at a time as well.
Soon Tony became even more frustrated that he could not achieve the climax he desperately needed. "More, Gibbs. I need more."
Gibbs sat back on his haunches. "Okay, roll over, the other way and get up on your knees." He assisted Tony in laying diagonally on the bed. He was not going to chance dislodging the IV. Tony kneeled and at the coaching of his boss and got up on all fours.
"Fuck my mouth, Tony."
Gibbs had laid flat on his back under him and had Tonyís cock at his lips. Tony looked down mesmerized at the site as his boss took a couple of tentative strokes on his own. He felt a sharp slap to his bottom before he began assaulting Gibbsí mouth. His thrusts got deeper and soon he was pushing into Gibbsí face with too much force and staying down too long. He hated himself, but Gibbs endured the punishment. He held his torso up with his arms watching his dick disappear into the manís mouth again, and again and again. He grinded into it and pulled all the way back out. He was rock hard and needing release so badly his cock hurt. He pulled himself away frustrated landing against the headboard. "I need more, Jethro. Please fuck me."
"Iím not going to fuck you, Tony."
"I have to come, Gibbs. I have to. Please."
"Listen to me. The first time I fuck you is not going to be because youíre hopped up on some bullshit designer drug and it sure as hell isnít gonna be because some bitch got one over on you. Understand?"
Tony nodded his head silently. Now what?
Gibbs looked at him worriedly. "Iíll let you fuck me." It was the only thing left to say.
Tonyís head snapped meeting blue eyes squarely. He gulped loudly. He couldnít. He couldnít possibly do that to the man. NO. NO. Nononono. A condom was rolled onto his cock. He didnít remember seeing Gibbs take his own clothes off but suddenly the man was as naked as he was. Tony nodded and moved forward mounting his boss as he lay flat on his stomach next to him. He lined his cock up with Gibbsí opening and began to thrust. Sudden grasping of hands on his hips stopped his progress.
"DiNozzo, Iíd rather not feel like I was being assaulted. Could you use a little lube at least?" He tossed the man the tube. ††
Tony looked at the tube. How could he not have thought of that? He could have hurt the man. Badly. Gibbs couldnít do this to Tony. He knew Gibbs, it was because it would be wrong to take from someone what they didnít offer up willingly under no duress. †Tony could do it to Gibbs though and not even think twice about it? Gibbs was under just as much duress as he was. Probably more because he was Gibbs and he protected his people. He was ashamed with himself. He might survive this but they would never survive. He squeezed a dollop of the viscous substance directly over Gibbs entrance. He heard Gibbs hiss and he ran his cock through the lubricant up his crack moving back and forth spreading the substance all over his cock.
"Easy, Tony. Itís been a really long time." Gibbs craned his head back to watch Tony with concerned eyes.
Easy? He had to be easy? But he couldnít control his own thoughts. How could he go easy? His only function and thought had nothing to do with right or wrong and only to do with fuck or be fucked. Now he was asking him to go easy? He growled unable to wait any longer and unable to grant Gibbsí request as he sunk quickly, deeply all the way inside. He allowed no time for the man to become accustomed to his size before he deepened and quickened his strokes. He pounded harder when he heard a satisfyingly loud groan of pain coming from beneath him. "Yes!" Pressure, warmth, friction, resistance, all he needed.
"Tony!" Gibbs knew he couldnít yell loudly or Ducky would come barreling into the room. He grabbed a pillow and hugged it closer to his body forcing himself to relax and breathe and ride it out. It couldnít take too long. Theyíd been at this for too long already and he wasnít sure he was doing Tony any favors.
"Feels so good." Tony hovered over Gibbs watching his dick disappear into the man once more. He held himself up on hands and toes just connected by the tip of his dick. "You." He stabbed into Gibbs hard and pulled back up again. "Are." Stab. "So." Stab. "Tight." Stab.
Gibbs winced with each stroke nearly biting a hole through the pillow. He sucked in a breath and turned back around cocking a knee up to one side. "Tony. Knock it off. Youíre way too worked up. Slower." This was way out of hand. Tony was being much more physical than he had intended. Time to tone it down and let the doc in. "Tony, stop." The pounding did not stop. He bit his lip and tried to relax more. The pounding was relentlessly hard. He had to give Tony a chance to finally get what he needed. Just a few more. He allowed a couple more thrusts wincing with each one. He was getting too dry as the onslaught continued. His ass burned with pain. "DiNozzo! Stop." He continued to feel the assault on his entrance. "Sonofabitch!"††† He turned, noticing the blissed out state Tony pushed into him with. He grabbed Tony easily knocking him off balance. He was aware they were no longer alone in the room when he pushed Tony into the headboard and cocked his fist back to punch him instinctively.
"Jethro!" Ducky took in the appearance of both men.
Gibbs grabbed the edge of the condom and pulled it off of Tony quickly and sprang from the bed.
Ducky quickly examined Tony taking his pulse and blood pressure and frowning as he pushed another medication syringe into his IV port. Tony slowly drifted to sleep. The doctor nodded as a spot in his periphery caught his gaze. There was a spot of blood on the sheets making him examine Tony further. Not seeing the source, he turned toward Jethro who was now zipping up his pants.
"Heís fine. Are you?"
"Iím fine, Duck."
"I was stupid. It got out of hand." Jethro ran a hand through his hair and bent down to grab his shirt.
"Jethro, did he assault you?"
"Doc! No, of course not." Shirt firmly in place. "Whatíd you give him? Heís out like a light."
"Yes, Abby completed a more comprehensive analysis on the drug and delivered an acceptable medication to treat him. He should have a much easier time of it now."
"I thought that wasnít going to be possible?"
"I didnít think it would. Most designer drugs have other drugs mixed in to counteract what the first drug lacks making treatment nearly impossible. This one was pretty straightforward if completely concentrated. Now that we have a complete analysis on it though, Iím certain he is safe with this dosage of sedative."
"Good." Jethro was pissed at himself for giving in. If heíd just sat in his damn chair and not listened to Ducky in the first place, none of this would have happened. "Fuck." He said it softly to himself before dismissing himself into the bathroom. He opened up the linen closet and found a hand towel. Letting the water run cold over the towel, he looked into the mirror and was disgusted with what he saw. How could he let this get so out of hand? Heíd only wanted to help his agent. Dammit. He reached for his pants and undid the zipper pushing them back off of his hips. The door opening made him stop his efforts. "Duck?"
"Yes, yes, I know. Youíre fine. Iíll just have a look then to make sure."
"I donít need... "
"Yes, well, humor me anyway. Now drop Ďem."
Gibbs stared into cold, resolute eyes. He huffed and turned as he let his pants fall to the floor.
"Bend over. Put your hands on the edge of the tub. Yes, that should be fine."
Gibbs shifted his weight uncomfortable with the exam but complied. He felt the doctor come up behind him and place a firm hand on his cheek.
"Iím afraid this is going to be a bit uncomfortable."
He winced as he felt the intrusive finger. How humiliating. He was being dabbed with a dry cloth and then cleaned. He stood suddenly ready for this to be over with.
"You wonít need stitches. Just watch your diet and let me know if the bleeding persists or gets worse."
He nodded his head as he buttoned his pants back up shuffling past Ducky and into the bedroom to watch the sleeping Tony DiNozzo. He sat gingerly in the chair and resigned himself to a long night and morning.
"Duck, itís not what you think." At his friendís look of suffering, he tried a more firm approach. "Do I look like a victim to you?"
Ducky took a deep, harried sigh and stood watching him.
"Look, I put the condom on him myself. I undressed myself."
"Then why are you beating yourself up so badly?"
"Well, because I was the one that let it get so far gone. He wonít remember his boss helping him out. Heíll remember the violence and the manipulation and heíll hate himself. I donít want to lose him, Duck."
"Then you had damn sure better make sure you donít, Jethro. Or youíll have me to answer to." Ducky moved back out to the living room once again.
Being alone with his thoughts was killing him as time ticked by slowly. He had to think of what to do to salvage this relationship so that his and Tonyís working relationship would still be intact. He had no delusions that any of what Tony had needed this night would translate into anything resembling actual want. Gibbs was just a body. A means to an end. Well, the end had been a syringe full of medication to knock him on his ass, but an end nonetheless. All Gibbs wanted was for it to be like it was before. To Tony and to the rest of the world they were a crime fighting dynamo which briefly brought images of Tony in a cape and tights, but he shrugged that image out of his brain just as quickly as it had popped in. He looked at the sleeping man across the room, chest rising and falling comfortably in sleep. There was no way around it. Heíd have to talk to him. Heíd have to sit down and have an open, honest conversation with him. Heíd rather literally cut off his right thumb than figuratively filet his heart open over coffee and bruschetta in his living room with Tony. That sucked monumentally, but Tony was important so heíd do it. Fuck.
Tony stretched languidly pulling in slowly the sunlight and his surroundings. Memories of the previous night assaulted him at a rapid-fire pace and he sat bolt upright. The fact that he was naked and in Gibbs bedroom confirmed what he was hoping was an over-exaggeration of his swiss-cheese brain.
"Good morning, sunshine." The familiar female voice intruded into his thoughts.
"Ziva!" He grabbed at the sheet pulling it up to his chest. "Whatíre you doing here?"
"Oh, youíre bashful. You werenít last night." She joked and placed a hand on his shoulder. Seeing the torture in her partnerís eyes, she thought sheíd let him off the hook easily. "I am joking. I just got here a couple of hours ago."
"What time is it?" He rubbed at a sore spots on his wrists and then took in the small bandage on his right forearm and pulled it off.
"It is 1500 hours. I am supposed to take your pulse upon awakening." She placed two fingers at his pulse point on the side of his neck and looked at her watch. When she was finished, she shoved a container at him. "Ducky says to fill this up and I should make sure you urinate myself." At his look as though someone was pulling on a snagged fishhook through his left eyebrow, she resolved. "I think once you fill the cup in the bathroom, that will be sufficient proof."
"I need some pants, Ziva."
"Ah, yes. Gibbs left these for you." She tossed him the sweat pants and turned around while he dressed.
"Where is Gibbs?"
"He went to the office. Said he had something he had to take care of."
Tony shook his head. Memories of last night assailed his brain. Heíd attacked Gibbs. He had to get back to his own apartment. He had some packing to do. He was sorry. God, he was so sorry but, he would not be able to face Gibbs again. Not after what heíd done. "Can you give me a ride back to my car?"
"Yes, I have been instructed to feed you and make sure you eat a full lunch."
She spoke in a tone that brooked no argument and Tony resigned that it would just be faster to eat whatever she told him to eat. He slipped behind her and into the bathroom with the cup pushing the door closed but not all the way shut.
She spoke louder. "And to deliver you to NCIS so Ducky could have another look at you before he cleared you for duty."
He had two choices. He either told her that he had no intention of staying at NCIS right now or he could simply go with the flow, head straight in to Ducky, passify the man that he was okay and grab his car and leave. Forever. Clean getaway. It would be hours, possibly days before they would realize he wasnít coming in. Heíd send in his resignation via email to Gibbs. It could take him weeks to find that. He tightened the lid on the cup and washed his hands.
Satisfied she had done that aspect of her job correctly, Ziva nodded. "Youíre car is at NCIS, yes?"
"You have time to take a shower before lunch is ready." She disappeared from the room quickly.
Tony searched for his own clothes. He tossed the covers in search of the missing items. The blood spot on the sheet made him flinch. He had done that to Gibbs. A flash of Gibbs with his arm cocked back ready to punch him flew into his head. ĎYou shoulda hit me, boss.í He looked around and didnít find any other evidence of the attack. The trash had been emptied in the bedroom and the bathroom. There was some lubricant and some condoms but, they were tucked neatly in a drawer in the nightstand. Feeling more dirty than when he woke up, Tony did shower and threw back on the sweats and T-shirt Gibbs had left for him.
After he had eaten everything on his plate, Tony and Ziva rode in silence back to NCIS headquarters. When Ziva parked her car and turned it off, she grabbed Tonyís arm before he could open his door. "Are you alright?" At his questioning look she continued. "You do not seem well. You are quiet. Are you ill?"
"Iím fine, Ziva." His wink and stellar grin caught her off guard as it usually did and she accepted the answer. She grabbed the brown paper bag and accompanied Tony into the building. "I think Gibbs will be happy to see you awake."
"He was worried. I called him when you were in the shower. He said to bring you to the bullpit before you see Ducky."
"Bullpen, Ziva, bullpen. Adapt already." His tone was good-natured though. "Listen, Ziva, I am feeliní kinda ... punky. Maybe I should go see Ducky first. See if he can help me out."
"Alright. I am sure Gibbs will not mind. Especially if you are feeling ... pinky."
Tony rolled his eyes and continued toward autopsy. He debated asking Ziva if he could just take the sample himself to Ducky and then sprint to his car and get out of dodge but, if he did that, she would only go up to Gibbs sooner and they would track him down before he could even gas up his car. Better to keep her in his sites until the last moment.
The doors opened with a swoosh and Tony made an effort to be himself at all costs. He grinned and joked as he tore off his t-shirt and quickly jumped up onto the cold, metal table without being asked. "Do with me what you will, Doc."
"You certainly are in a much better mood than I had anticipated, Anthony."
"Good rest, shower, excellent meal and of course." He motioned toward Ziva who pulled out the requisite sample cup from the brown bag. "A nice long pee to get the morning going." He looked at his watch. "Of course, this morning isnít exactly morning, but what defines a morning... the presence of the post a.m. after the time or simply when one is starting yet another glorious day?"
Ducky looked at him skeptically before finding his medical bag and setting it down on the table. He looked toward Ziva. "That can go to Abigail, my dear."
Before Ziva could turn around, Tony beckoned her to come back. "Ziva, what was that wonderful lunch you made for me? It was so different. Was that something from your country?"
She raised an eyebrow. "It was a grilled ham and cheese."
"Well, yea, that was but what about what you served with it?"
Ducky pulled off the blood pressure cuff and began listening to his chest. "Be quiet and breathe deeply please."
"Potato chips and a salad."
Tony sighed in frustration.
"Iím taking this to Abby." She turned and left the room.
"Mustíve been the dressing then!" He clarified loudly as the doors swooshed closed.
"Anthony. Are you alright? XTC is not known for its amnesiac effects, however Iím certain there are aspects about last night that are either unclear or for which you have questions. Jethro has assured me that he plans on discussing this with you. Are you averse to doing that?"
"To doing what? Talking with the boss man?" ĎTalking to him about why I abused his loyalty and his trust and why I fucking raped him? NO, why the hell would I be averse to doing that?í "Looking forward to it." Tony smiled although it didnít come off as a smile of understanding and self-worth so much as hurt and sorrow.
The smile was disconcerting. "I think Iím going to draw some blood quickly just to make sure the drug has completely left your system. You stay put. Iíll be right back."
Ziva stepped into the squad room and strode over to her desk confidently. "Mission accomplished."
Gibbs looked toward the back elevator from where she had come from. Not finding Tony behind her frustrated him. Heíd given her instructions. "How the hell could the mission be accomplished when Tony isnít in this room right now?"
She sat in her chair. "He said he was still feeling pinky and he needed to see Ducky first."
"You just now left him in autopsy?"
"A few minutes ago, yes."
"How many minutes ago?"
"I escorted him there, dropped of his sample to Abby and then came up here. He said heíd meet me here in a few minutes."
"No, he wonít." Gibbs grabbed his gun and keys from the desk drawer and stopped to answer the phone since the caller ID stated the call was from Duckyís extension. "Do you have eyes on him right now?"
"Well, no. Iím getting supplies. Heís waiting for me to draw blood."
"No heís not. Heís already gone." †He hung up his phone with a slam. When Ziva and McGee rose to follow him he barked out at them. "Stay!"
Not the headstart heíd wanted but, he knew when Ducky left the room, he was going to call Gibbs. He was surprised the gate hadnít been alerted to stop him, but he counted his blessings and beelined it for the train station. He was already packed. Lesson number one as a federal agent was to keep a fly-away plan with easy access. He had enough cash to make it to someplace far from Washington DC before heíd lay low, let it blow over and finally figure out what the next move was. †
Gibbs flew down the highway toward Tonyís apartment. He wanted to have a face-to-face as soon as he got to his destination. He cursed himself for leaving his house that afternoon but, Fornell had given him no option. There were loose ends to tie up and heíd already put him off all morning. One oíclock had been pushing it. A sickening thought crossed his mind as he careened down the road. Tony might not be there. He picked up his cell phone. "Abs, track down Tonyís cell phone and give me his position?"
"Why? Is Tony in trouble? Ziva said he was just in autopsy. Whatís ..." She was cut off by the abrasive tone.
"On it, boss-man." He heard the ticking of fingers on the keyboard before Abby finally spoke. "Yea, like Ziva said. Heís in autopsy."
"No, he ditched his phone in autopsy. Get a GPS coordinate on his car, Abs."
"Gibbs, whatís goiní on? I donít like this."
"Later, Abs. Just get me the coordinates."
"Gibbs, his GPS has been deactivated. What the hell is..."
He cut her off when he flipped his cell phone closed. "Son of a BITCH!" He slammed the break doing a quick 180 and heading back in the opposite direction.
Confident he could finally make a clean break, Tony grabbed the gym bag from the locker, slung it over his shoulder and strode back toward his car. On the way to his car he mourned the loss of his dvd collection, the plasma television, his designer shoes. His friends and the life he loved. He wished he was a stronger man. He just couldnít look his boss in the eye anymore without seeing what heíd done. Heíd half expected Ziva to arrest him this morning, but Gibbs would never say anything. First and foremost, Gibbs protected his team. Even though he no longer felt worthy of that protection, Tony couldnít fault the man for it. If the situation were reversed heíd have done the same.
He strolled past his green mustang shaking his head. He was gonna miss that car. The blue charger sat in a spot a few cars over. The door unlocked with a blip and he tossed the bag into the back seat before taking a seat in front. The passenger side door opening startled him and he had his gun drawn before the man sat down. Recognition came quickly and he dropped his gun down onto his lap. "Fuck! Seriously?"
"Well, you tell me, DiNozzo. Looks pretty serious to me."
"How in the hell did you find me?"
"Youíve had a bus station locker key on your key ring since about a month after you started working for me."
Tony sighed and flung his head back against the headrest. "Youíve got to be..." He grinned. "You are the jedi master. I should have known youíd know."
Tony shook his head. He didnít know what to say or how to start a conversation his boss seemingly demanded they have. What could he possibly say? ĎSorry about that rape thing. No hard feeling?í
"What do you think happened last night?"
The question was too general. Lots of things happened that night. ĎI was at the bust, I got dosed with X, my boss put his career on the line to help out a teammate and I fucked him over. Literally.í "Iím ... uh." He squirmed in his seat determined to make his apologies. It was only fair Gibbs get that at least. "Iím so sorry, boss. I didnít mean to ..."
"You think you forced me?"
Tony turned to look Gibbs in the eyes. Of course he had forced him. Why else would he...?
"I wasnít forced to do anything, Tony."
Tony huffed. "Gibbs I remember ..." The vision of him pounding relentlessly into Gibbs over and over, Gibbs telling him to stop but being unable to respond, finally the look in Gibbsí eyes after he had thrown Tony aside and pulled his fist back. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "There was blood and..."
"Yea, so? If you have full memory than you remember that I offered myself to you. I told you to do it. Remember?" At Tonyís look of confusion he pressed on. "I put the condom on you and I handed you the lube. I made a mistake, Tony. I just wanted you sedated so you wouldnít hurt so badly, but you were suffering so much, for hours it went on and on, I just wanted to help. If anything, I took advantage of you. Iím the one who should be sorry."
"You took advantage?" Now Tony was really confused.
Gibbs shifted in his seat uncomfortably now. "I...Iíve had feelings for you for a long time now."
"You have feelings for me?" Tony interrupted.
Exasperated Gibbs moved on. "Like I said, I have feelings for you..."
"Like special feelings?"
"Yea, DiNozzo. You gonna let me finish my story or what?"
"Anyway! Ducky called me on it... these feelings ... last night and told me I should just come to my senses and help you. I had the perfect excuse to have you, even had the prescription to do it and instead of giving you the minimum of what you might need to get you through the night, I took it way too far and you know how much I hate apologies, but I am truly sorry for that."
†Tony shook his head. "You shouldnít be sorry. You sacrificed everything to help me."
"Well you shouldnít be sorry."
"Maybe neither of us should be sorry."
The moment stretched on before Gibbs broke the silence. "Tony?"
"Are you gonna go put your bag back into your bus locker?"
Tony scrunched his face and shook his head. "I think itíll look weird if I do."
"Yea, probably." He took another breath. "Hey, DiNozzo."
"Wanna go back to my place and fuck like bunnies?"
Tony sat up straight instantly turning the key in the ignition. "I prefer the term jack rabbits but, yea." He squeeled the wheels as he fled from the parking lot.
Gibbs smiled. "Iím on top."